Do excuse me if I was getting a little too emotional just now, because the fact is, I was emotional, but that's all over now and I'm feeling hyped on music. I want to be a rich girl; so rich that the other girls would just die to exchange financial status with me. Nique, you've got a girlfriend whose monetary expectations are high. What are you planning to do about that? (Clue : Future Planning)

If I was a rich girl
See, I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl
No man could test me, impress me, my cash flow would never ever end
Cause I'd have all the money in the world, if I was a wealthy girl

News has reported that a family had just passed on this afternoon. A father killed his wife and two children before ending his own life by taking a flight down from his flat.

It's really upsetting to see a family end up in this state, and it saddens me deeply to be reading happenings like this. They lived just three blocks away from where my home is, where my daycare centre was.

God, sometimes, can be so unfair. He pushes the good people to a dead end, and sends them to hell for what he created in the first place. I'm sorry if this seems blasphemic but it is my opinion afterall. The preacher once told his followers that 'everyone that enters the gate of heaven as equal'. He went on saying that all memory will be wiped out and that you'll live life after the life in this world as equal saints in heaven. I don't get the point. The only reason you live well in life for the right reason is because of love. You love your spouse, you love your family, you love your neighbours; and when you die, you won't be able to even recognise your loved ones. Isn't that sheer agony in heaven? God gives the rich better things so that the poor will be rich after death, but what's the point, even if you do live a perfect afterlife. Sometimes when a dilemma gets too complexed to solve, you feel all bitter, and God shouldn't blame you for that. We aren't perfect and we can never be. Since God made Man sinful, he should never blame us on the acts of sin for the ones we love. Or should he? Free will and free choice are options, but when options stand equal on the scale, what do you turn to?

However, I will be praying for the family who passed on to the next. May the Lord grant them mercy, especially the father.

I'm afraid.

I'll hate kayaking because it stole time with you from me this weekends. It's weekends like this one that makes me feel horrid being so far apart from you. It would be great if I could see you sooner than I told you I would.

I'd give anything to have you right beside me residing all your endeavours out at sea today, telling me how you ache from the rowing of your expedition; just to watch you smile with such exhileration.

The realisation hit me just this afternoon; in fact it knocked me pretty hard. More than often, I'd explain to you that mouthing the words don't hold much weightage to me if said conveniently. I don't spit the words at the tip of my tongue and make profession given so readily. But I love you more than I thought I did.

Shall we date basking in the love of the sun sometime, honey?

Spent the entire day doodling with HTMLs and playing around with Dreamweaver MX. My PC is lacking Microsoft Frontpage; that moronic computer reformatting guy didn't have it installed for me. I've been working on a new blog template, with my private blog as the guinae pig for my experiments on web designs. I heard it designs webpages easier than Dreamweaver. Maybe I'll give it a go at school's free access lab during the holidays. Phoebe will be teaching me how to create vector graphics out of images. Dana and I will be working on new blog templates this holidays.

Nique's kayaking at East Coast, whilst Phoebe's at East Coast snapping pictures for BaPho. I've been pretty cold towards Nique these few days; I simply refuse my anger to be triggered. I don't want any form of temptation for me to be angry or frustrated with. I miss Nique actually, just that I don't say it out as much as I feel so.

Mirrors don't lie (got this phrase from I-forgot-where, but I'll grant credits when I finally remember/find the site).

Hit the pool before noon, and swam until the sun got too scorching for the perfect tan. Within 2 hours, I managed to upkeep a bit of my old tan. 20 laps and we ran out of time. I'm planning on getting another dog, a puppy preferably, as company for my poop. Nothing fascinating or interesting to blog about today except that as usual, I'm packed to the brim with projects to be submitted on my last week of school as a freshie. Finally a junior, after 30 weeks of being labelled as 'freshie'.

Photoshop's a miracle worker.

I know I might be a tad bit demanding, but I want to meet the long-lost-friends during my two months holidays break. Nique had her share of laughs when she chanced upon someone today at Bugis (hell she sure did).

I still can't believe another semester is about to pass me by just like that, without me being able to work my fullest for it. It seems that everybody's pretty much screwed up this semester, not due to complacency or laziness, but purely due to the reason of the lack of time.

We're drawing inner deeper in the circle of our world. I wouldn't have been taught the right way to love if there wasn't you. I read the messages from then till now, and they haven't changed my decision; my choice never faltered. The life and love in you seldom fails in bringing smiles to my day, which is why I'll be needing you around for as long as I can retain you in our circle.

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be praying every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

Safari doesn't support the font-colour-change system, neither does FireFox, so I guess it only leaves me with the dreaded Internet Explorer, which I will insist on not supporting.

By right, I shouldn't be complaining of the lack of attention, I shouldn't even mouth the words of grumble when I have everything I could ever ask for. There are people whom I know out there who are deprived of the mutal relationship I have at hand now. I've been so selfish, I speak of people acting selfish, but it never occurred to me that all I needed to do was to take a look at the mirror and see what contradiction I have made myself turn out to be. Whichever it is, I am sorry Nique, for forever being mad at you. Projects and stress aren't excuses fit to give me reasons to treat you the way I do.

Not to forget, thanks Miss Lille Wang, for allowing me to join the Friday class, saving me from being debarred from the subject!

That moron really went to sleep when I'm here happily getting mad at her. I'm totally drained out from all my mental energy. Sometimes I wish I wouldn't have to live so hard just to make my point, then living wouldn't be such a hassle. Life and living would really brighten up and be more enjoyable. Slogging so much this manner will just result in me hating what I do, which will take me back to my secondary school days when I hated most of the people there.

Life the life you dread. That's the way things run.

LDSCHR presentation this morning fell all over at my feet, and I couldn't pick it up in time. But luckily for me, he didn't make any remarks or comments about my presentation. I'm positive our group did better than the other group working on the same well-known leader. In 40 minutes time, I'll be hitched up with Wahidah for consultation. After the consultation comes the orientation meeting. I have to hand in my pattern designs and colour schemes for colour, and the Fort Canning drawing tomorrow.

It's our 2nd monthsary! How time flies (as I've already said before) and we're here a step deeper. I've embarked in a journey that feels as heaven as forever, and I never wish for it to end. You're all I adore. I'll never be able to look at anyone else's eyes and tell them I love them the way I tell you. I'll never be able to be embraced in anyone else's arms and tell them that I'm meant to be in them. I love you Nique.

*I hope you liked the present I did for you!

So I didn't manage to continue my blogging last night due to blogger refusing to load its page for me. What frustration to endure. I've officially finished my second and last assignments for VisCo, leaving me with the first one left, which I'm too lazy to do. I don't understand VisCo's stuff like how I don't understand why Phek Gek requests so much from one simple problem. It's people like her that tire us design students out. Anyway, I'm happily done with the second monthsary gift for Nique; I think she'll like it (or so I hope). Mum's not feeling well lately and I don't know what's wrong either, but I'm trying my best to offer help around the house.

When you think I've loved you all I can, I'm going to love you a little bit more.