She stood her ground like a man yet held me with a woman's overwhelm. Strangest control. Her bewitching philosophies blasphemed all of my hopeful dreams and ambitions. She pursed and pouted her lips with petty series of tantrums, and her prize was my captured adoration. God gave her the most amazing smile; to charm, hypnotise and change a woman as wretched as me. She laid her fingers along my piano and I became the teacher who learned to love. Words, plenty she lured me deep with. I dived into these sweet nothings and still discover myself drowning from time to time. Phantom, we bestowed with stinging empathy onto her. A title, a name, that smeared the joy she used to wear. She was my life's throbbing irony, but her love was beautiful, beyond answered prayers. Pierces of ambiguity wouldn't suffice or redeem the sorry circumstance we've landed ourselves into. This stain of distrust, it never started to hurt and it didn't hurt when it started. We were once plain and simple; we became Phantom and Cristine, oh yes, just like them fools of lust and love and all the passion words spoke of. Dis-involving still seems far from feasible.

Not knowing if I'd ever fall forever in a smile again, draws me into this box. And fear is my dominant emotion.

I'm still wretched. Please forgive me.