Today, I bought a $1 sticker from an old crippling man selling ez-link stickers at the bus stop. He was selling them at the bus stop because heartless governing call-the-shots chased him out of the MRT station, which would have indefinitely been more lucrative for his already measly $1-a-sticker sales. He was standing thin swimming in his baggy clothing (in which was obviously stamped not a first-hand possession of his), heavily (the irony) leaning on his walking stick and multi-handling the gigantic stack of stickers with the cash people were reluctantly handing him with. Firstly, how could anyone's, inclusive of authorities outside the train station, heart not cringe with guilt of self-indulgence at the sight of an old man painfully trudging across the bus stop, over and over again, just to get them (yes you, self-centred woman who wore faux pas burberry skirt) who gave him the "get lost beggar" look) to out of kindness, purchase a $1 ez-link sticker?

I was feeling so proud of myself for handing him a $2 note for one sticker when I witnessed my fellow nation's people just shun away from him like some plague. It was then that I felt so bad on their behalf, I took my wallet right out and sensed an urge from my conscience to hand him the last $2 in my wallet. He declined when I offered. And at this very second where he rejected my offer, guilt rushed over me and took me over. A thought reached me. I wanted to extend a little more Godliness and comfort by inviting him to a lunch treat. But I was afraid to, because I had never done something like that before. Today would probably be a good kick start but that didn't get me stepping forward to pry those words out of my mouth. I, like all other of those people, would waste hundreds of dollars a month lavishing on luxurious food and clothing, have always thought of life to suck. This elderly human being, who was probably 50 years my senior, was earning his lunch's content selling these stickers that we (healthy and able) people think of uselessly. We, the living dead souls of this age and time, have caused hurt and pain to our own kind, humanity and conscience. It daunted upon me that life was not that bad after all, that the higher omnipotence above was giving me signs and hitting me hard on the fact that I have been complaining about my life way too unnecessarily.

It struck me, how much I took the simplest and most comforting of all little big things forgranted. I watched him struggle in and out of the bus stop shelter and a nerve of unworthiness struck me apart. Uncontrollably the tears started to surface. I had re-discovered the reason why I am human - my conscience. He understood every expression which began lingering on my face and gave me a quiet nod, acknowledging a sense of gratitude for the way I felt. No, my gesture would never be enough, but I will start someday.

I am intending on embarking on at least one charity deed during this two weeks break from work. I am far too plunged down the pit of badness to be attaining good karma, so let's just take it as me making up for all the misdeeds and complacency I have been dwelling in. For nearly all my life, I have been chasing things in which don't need chasing. Now, I have found a cause so worthy of my incessant running after. I am going to give back the good that I have ever received.

I do hope I materialise my little ambition here. Everyone needs a little bit of charity every now and then. Even people like you and I.

This is a start.