Narrator:

(So apropos:

Saw death on a sunny snow)


Him:

"For every life..."


Her:

"Forgoe the parable."


Him:

"Seek the light."


Her:

"...My knees are cold."


(Running home, running home, running home, running home...)


Her:

"Go find another lover;

To bring a... to string along!"


"With all your lies,

You're still very lovable."


"I toured the light; so many foreign roads for Emma, forever ago."


Bon Iver - For Emma, Forever Ago


Bon Iver must have loved her very deeply, who ever she was.

You are the one, who made changed my perspectives. You are the one, who makes every single detailed difference to what I thought was true to believe. I'd probably lose my world and all heart to love another, if I ever lost you.

Thank you for never thinking of walking out. Thank you for the unwavering faith you have, and for the faith you instill in me. Thank you, for being my perfect kind of different. Thank you, for restoring this lost heart of mine.

UO stuff are so yummy for the eyes. Rough idea for friends for my turning 24 birthday.

Oh, you may click on names of items to view pictures.

1. Deena and Ozzy Foldover Boot (Size 6, Brown)
2. Chelsea Crew Savoy Wedge Boot (Size 6, Black)
3. Wood Wood Tote Bag (Brown)

Or should I just stop considering and buy it already?

Hurt, please go away. Misery, please don't overwhelm me. Because old habits die hard, so hard.

God, please hear me tonight. God, I have noone. God, I feel miserable. God, all I can think of is letting me die.

It saddens me to the core of my soul, that you chose to be complacent on the little faith and trust I was left with for our relationship. It was a great blood-tied love that I held priceless as a promise to God. But you have mercilessly disregarded the pains you have caused to the many hearts that make this home. And it's this very you that has evolved over the many years, that caused three women to be labelled with a 'broken home'.

With the series of pitfalls in fate that has been a constant in this family, I can no longer bring myself to love and view you the way I could, because all you are to me comprises of multitudes of pasts involving unimaginable hurt. You used to be a figure of respect and adoration to me. You used to be the protector of the world that I yearned and battled to remember, but you have shirked those roles and have compelled me to inherit them.

All my heart wants to do now, is to stop beating.

You feel like sunrise every morning. You feel like pleasant dreams every night. You feel like the best moment of my life, every second in between.

Perhaps it's true, I fell in love at hello with you.

Alas, in the finest and simplest luxury of slinking my aching mind back in my resting arena of a couch. All kinds of thoughts and intentions have belted at me this week, yet there is not one that is recollected to be prominent enough to be executed. My mind seems adrift, nearly blank, but surely there are thousands of these matters that totter at the back of this thinking space. There is just too much love lost this year, so much loss that tragedy appears eminent.

Here in the well of my heart, I wish I could be the best of everything that I am - first and most formally, a daughter; an other half to the man who loves me certainly as much as I do him; a best friend to the strangers God have sent to be inclined to feel as near as family. These people, are the closest I have to family.

Hope as a position, is devlishly interpreted as vacant, but I am no fool to the marvels of hope, and there is hope everywhere. There is love every corner we turn, and my corner of this fundamental of hope is within you.

I love you.

There is a life ahead, that's made for me and you together.

Maybe you will be the one who shows me what forever is.

I made a promise to you long ago, that I’d do anything to keep this home.

We met at ButterFactory. I (, who had a drink too much,) picked him up without agenda with a "hi what's your name?", made him sit and listen to my ramblings in my drunkard stupor, persuaded him into our first and last (to date) dance with him, gentlemanly walked him to his taxi, and our first song refuses to get less radical than Frozen Creek. Everything reads trashy and seems to be interpretated not to endure, but this is the most beautiful relationship I've ever had.

Your family welcomed and accepted me with so much love and acceptance that the night leaves me overwhelmed. There is nothing in this memory capacity of mine that recalls being sincerely loved, until now. And with this gratitude and appreciation for the immaterially superior insertion, feelings deepen and fasten themselves secure - assurance of safety and a future together.

With this ascertained affinity on my part, comes the perfect knowledge of the fact that there is a world of what we have built to be lost. I am afraid, of facing the admittance of truly being happy, for fear that it may be taken away. Above fearing the thieves of joy, I fear that someday this imperfect perfection may transition into a translation of you walking away. Ultimately, I am scared, of losing you. These words do not manifest the distrust I have in you; complete trust is something rare and seldom, that has been naturally and thoroughly entrusted to you. I just plainly and simply, am inconfident of myself of being able to retain any good love. You are entirely different from every other guy I've ever known, and I know that well. You hold me and without a word uttered, I am safe. Your heart has become my home.

It is crucially important that you read this (or at least this portion of my long-winded muse). Despite the rough night of our second month of getting together, I still believe in a future with you. I still want to love you for as long as our lives prolong. I still want to be dreaming of multitudes of things with you even after fulfilling what we deem as dreams now. We share beautiful dreams. We share great dreams. We dream of things that this world wouldn't ever understand. And we share these dreams together. You're so special. We're so special.

Frozen Creek. Despite its lyrics and intentions, this tune will always reverbrate the best reminisce of the first day I was over at your place.

I love you, till it never ends, my Goldfish.

In 2011, I will...

- Be prayerful, thankful and always keep God close
- Get baptised and confirmed on Easter Day
- Approach Michael's parents to be my godparents at baptism and beyond
- Work hard for the 3 confirmed contracts I clinched with Town4Kids
- Be the best damn teacher I can ever be
- Be filial to my parents and godparents
- Be a loving girlfriend to Benjamin and love his family as my own, to my utmost
- Give mum $200 every month
- Give dad $100 every month
- Save at least $500 every month
- Save at least $5,000 by the end of the year
- Bring mum for a sponsored trip (which I intend to make an annual tradition)
- Go on a short trip with Benjamin and my best friends (maybe this could be combined with the one sponsored for mum.)
- Quarterly treat my best friends to meals
- Visit the dentist for scaling
- Get my Panasonic Lumix LX3
- Quit smoking