Four days ago, I was unfortunately plagued by a 39degrees fever, a heinous bout of sore throat, a nose that runs and blocks co-currently. Still recovering from this phenomenal befall of flu, it's nearly impossible to begin imagining the full-day shifts I'll be undertaking the next three days. July's a hectic month, with me playing the diligent and money-thirsty bullock.

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Did sunshine occupy your day? Did you remember that we used to smile more radiantly? Did a smile chance upon your face while reminiscing childhood and old days? Was the past measured with sheer happiness and nothing else? When we were younger, birthdays were with party hats and growing amount of candles and loved ones encircling one gigantic cake with cartoon characters inked on it. Sunday mornings were festooned with excited plans to the beachside to picnic, with endeared kins closeby. And during the nights of the weekends, Daddy would take us on a spin, which Mummy ungratefully complained was asking for a speeding ticket, before proceeding to supper. New found love was refreshing and adventurous with life, we as youngsters, sworn an eternity or two together, blissfully in love. Friendships striking their significance towards every child's adulthood. So much to behold.

Wait, did a loved one cause you tears? Did your heart slight a crackle? Did I hear you sniff sorrow? You watched past birthday video clips and forced a bittersweet smile; birthdays no longer need confetti and decorated cakes, they just carve deep in hearts. Now, we eat costly Tiramisu cakes instead of affordable confectionary ones. Daddy and Mummy no longer get along well. They age and are withering in health and finances. You struggle to cope. You keep struggling until you find it difficult to breathe in reality. Daddy scrimps on petrol so he stops bringing the family out. He even stopped coming home often. We wonder why he's seldom present at home. Mummy now complains at his poor refusal. My sister has found love in a Malay boy at sixteen whereas I'm at the lost-and-found phase of where things eventually begin. It is somebody new I'm embarking my heart's journey on, with tight reservations. We don't vow a prolonging lifetime of commitment and love to each other, we're just dating. Someday we might. We just might. However, I'm having myself exposed to a whole new dimension of a much-chased-after craze called Love. Friends have arrived and departed in ways more than one. Letting go is part and parcel. I should have known and learnt, so that I wouldn't have sunk in too much into details. Your heart pours and it these thought-spills convert into blog entries.

Isn't life remarkable?

I believe in beginnings, and of course, in endings too. But nobody really likes endings although we all know that endings are inevitable. I'll learn to dance to its music and cherish what ever is at hand.